Sunday 15 July 2012

Never too late....

MAN... well haven't written too much in term 2 as it is the most chaotic term in our household every single year. We have rugby 7 days a week, plus working, plus kids sport, plus my husbands many commitments...just utter CRAZY. However Term 3 has hit and I'm feeling a little more on top of it all after that shocking term.

I am currently also studying a diploma in counselling. Yeah a little crazy but hay why not?
My train of thought was i love my job as a hairdresser and I'm wanting to improve my skills when i chat to my clients, so i can help and understand them a little better and know how to handle situations that may arise in conversations we have in my home salon.
I also am very interested down the track to specialise in Woman's health and also first time mother's.
My aim is to open an centre or even a premises that allows me to combine both skills of hairdressing and helping the needs of mums/women. Its my 5 year plan. doing the study now so hopefully when Mr T starts prep i can dive into this 110%.
I attended a workshop yesterday and OMG was it amazing or what. So many beautiful women with so many stories. Blew me away. We did role playing where we had to try and help that person and guide them in the right directions...I had the most amazing time. I had no fear. All the women were over 30 mainly looking for a career change. There was 4 hairdressers...go figure. 4 teachers. a few that worked in government jobs in admin, and a few stay at home mums. One was even 20 weeks pregnant with a 2 year old and didn't want to go back to her old job she has had for 17 years.
There was no judgements no trying to out do each other there was no high maintenance women it was really a great group of women each with there own story. And a lot with "Life" experiences.
I said to my husband last night I'm glad now i have chosen to do this its something that can add to my hairdressing. i learnt yesterday that i show even my hair clients too much feeling the first thing i want to do when i hear someone upset is to console them and tell them its OK, however in counselling its a different approach so yesterday i learnt how to separate the 2 and not get so emotionally involved with my clients. it really did all make sense to me. i also learnt a few positive parenting tips to bring into our home to use on the boys. which i tried last night and worked very well....the SANDWICH AFFECT.......positive/negative/finishing on a positive....ALWAYS.
Mr J thank you for putting your clothes away.....how about next time though you put your socks and undies away too?.......but I'm very proud of you for doing your clothes...good boy!
I think in the busiest of life we can forget the small things like this...it was good to be reminded and do role plays on how to do things a little better....

Totally wasted today though....WOW!!! my brain is DEAD!!!
managed to write a draft of a 1500 word assignment on Saturday night though in between Mr E vomit- ting 4 times through his bed and husband at the rugby union and 2 fight older boys....ARRRRGGGG!!!
And the best thing was normally i feel guilty leaving the family if i have something like this on but this time I didn't ....i was able to focus and concentrate and know everything is totally cool at home, and my husband did a fantastic job. everyone had sleeps washing done....very proud of them all.
A friend wished me good luck on Friday for the workshop and she said....Its so good your boys are seeing a strong, smart hardworking mother as their role model...... then maybe they might not marry a pole dancer.....cracked me up!!!!

Monday 28 May 2012

I hate using the word disappointed...it sucks!

Last night would of had to have been my toughest night ever (so far) being a tough parent.
Why is it so hard sometimes to keep the standards high...to keep the discipline high...to keep trying to teach them that this will shape them later on in life...i know my stuff, i was a hard core teenager and a pretty driven, motivated person since i can remember, I'm here to help and teach and guide...but obviously these night will happen...sadly.

Master 12 arrives home from school yesterday with a massive headache...i could see his eyes were red and he did look a little unwell. I gave him panadol and sent him to bed to rest and said...rep rugby training is at 6pm we need to leave by 5.30pm so rest till we have to leave. Then i got on with working in the front room.
At 5.20pm all hell breaks loose because master 12 has informed me hes too sick to go to training...i do understand...however if it was school or club training i would have rested him. Rep training is a different story. And its too late to call the manager!!!
I advise him that maybe we go to the training and he informs the coach that hes not feeling the best and can he "take it easy" he goes ...NO!
right...I then go into my spiel about letting the team down...he switched off i think...so i made him get dressed i loaded up all 4 children and headed to Toowong so "I" could tell the coach at least and inform him that Master 12 wasn't 100%. I get a mum to watch the little ones i head to the coach...as I'm heading there a parent asks where's master 12...i said hes not 100% well with a headache. She informs me he better get out there you only can miss 2 training sessions then your dropped BJRU rules for rep teams. Blood is boiling now.
I tell the coach master 12 isn't well, he say's can you get him out of the car because if he gets injured or "really" sick over the next few weeks he would only have one spare training session up his sleeve then he would get dropped. I storm back to the car.
I say to him over and over again while i have a 2year old and a 5 year old fighting...and a 7 month old baby screaming because he wants his bottle....is your headache bad enough to loose one of your training sessions...? I'm not getting out he says!
Me: so if next week your vomiting into a bucket you will have to take that bucket out on the field and train? Can you not just "try " with a headache so you still have 2 training sessions up your sleeve in case you injure yourself at school cross country..? NO!
I started the car and drove home. i couldn't speak. i was so disappointed.
I had the chat with master 12 the week before asking him before we paid the $245 rep kit fee if he was serious and wanted to do it...i got a yes. i said you will be in 3 rugby teams for about 5-6 weeks can you handle this...Yes mum.
you have CIC cross country for school and then regionals are you sure your ok? Yes mum.
cross country money paid...rep money paid.
I think he learnt his lesson that i was disappointed last night that he didn't "try" to go out there, i always say its better to go and then they.. can see how sick you are and they can send you home.. then they can see your commitment.
I think master 5 learnt a big lesson in commitment last night....as master 12 got out of the car this morning for school...cause there was no way in hell he was having the day off. He goes to him..."you have only one chance left...just one chance!" Master 12 is steering  clear of me, he ate his dinner took more panadol and was in bed by 7.15pm last night. I couldn't even speak. But i hope hes learnt his lesson. parenting SUCKS!

Monday 12 March 2012

flatty flat flat flat!!!

well, yesterday was one of those days where you just have no energy and you just cant be bothered.

Car had to go in and get looked at as it was stalling off and on so i had booked it in for 9am Monday morning after dropping Son #1 and #2 off to school hubby stayed home watching #3 and #4. that shattered me.
then we had to transfer the car seat out of the silver car into hubby's car so we could take #3 and #4 to drop off silver car and hubby could get us home before he headed to work...I'm telling you that was an effort.
get home unload kids, hubby goes off to work.
sleep time...i can usually get them down at the same time which worked a treat again yesterday praise the lord. Now usually as soon as they hit their beds...washing hung out dinner gets prepared before the onslaught of the afternoon sport slash witching hour...I had no motivation to even walk down the back stairs...i pulled out some chicken breasts for dinner out of the freezer...that was it.
phone rings at 12.30pm car is ready...perfect right when 2 kids are sleeping...but i had to get it before the school pick up at 2.45...again the juggling hat goes on...my father in law helps me by bringing my sister in law over to watch the kiddies while he takes me up the road to grab my car...perfect.
not long after getting home i load the pram up and head over to school for son #2. Son #4 falls asleep again.
Home for arvo tea for half and hour then up the road to drop #3 son to mother in law then head to swimming for #1 and #2...with #4 in toe. I ring #1 son to see that he walked home ok...hes ready to walk up to swimming which is a god send because i don't have to do a extra trip to get him.

do the swimming networking thing while sucking down a can of coke to prep me for the nightmare of dinner/bathing/witching hour/a fight or 100....
Head back to grab #3, #1 walking thank the lord.
unload the car...ok dinner...that i should have started at 12...I'm now behind. #3 in bath...#2 watching TV...#4 in walker getting crabby...#1 walks in ...talks your head off for 10 mins then disappears to fight with #2 who was minding his own business....let the fighting begin. as that starts #3 starts screaming he wants to get out of the bath...#4 starts screaming had enough of the walker...and theres a punch up in the lounge room...rice nearly boiled dry as i have to feed #4...and get #1 to get #3 out of the bat before he floods the floor like 3 out of 7 nights last week...
dinner finally cooked....#1 starting to whinge cause he "starving' from swimming...going as fast as i can mate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
plates on table drinks poured...i sit down with a baby on my lap who falls asleep while feeding....
one word EXHAUSTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
should have not wasted my time during the day i suppose...but some days your just flatty Mcflatty!! i couldn't get motivated. paid for it at 5pm didn't i...that will teach me...
today...washing done, dinner sorted, kids asleep and i even listed some baby things on ebay....now to gear myself up for this afternoons events.......NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! lol

Wednesday 7 March 2012

let kids be kids...

well its been another interesting week...

An email from a cranky parent about their son and rugby, followed by a write up in the courier mail about my husbands rugby...it really never ends.

We all think our kids are the best! My god its only natural as a parent to want them to succeed and do well in their life. And its our job as a parent to steer them in the right direction. As you know i have 4 boys and i can tell you right now each one of them is different. And I'm glad they are.

I think there is a line though that as a parent you need to STOP and take a step back.

Grading for son #1's team was last Sunday and yes i was a little nervous. There are a lot of very skilled kids out there and half back is a very specific position in rugby union and very sort after so yes i was nervous for him.
we had a little chat before the trials and once out on the field my nerves soon faded as he was ticked on the list quiet quickly and he had got it on his own merit too as my husband is the coach but they had independent selectors watching the boys. that's done and dusted....whew! and i was so happy for him because hes with his friends and also playing in div 1 again which is a great opportunity for him to develop as a player.

2 boys from our team last year however did not make it. So here comes the email. It was independently looked at. There is much anyone can do when everyone takes a step back and outsiders come in the look at the boys. Its life not getting picked. And we had talked to son #1 about this happening. Sometimes in life you do also have to prepare your kids that its not always going to go "their" way. what happens if you don't get picked for the job you go for? are you going to email and complain?

As for the "drama" that my poor husband is dealing with (these boys are older), And sometimes have chips on their shoulders...but again sometimes things in life don't go to plan or clash...so then you make a choice. Many things in your life will clash with something else or you may have work commitments or sporting commitments that's when you decide "whats the most important to me?" and then wear the consequences of your decision. If that means you don't play first XV rugby because you want to play club league then do it. Life is about CHOICES. you will soon realise if you have made the right or wrong choice.
What also annoys me is some of these boys whose fathers are now "running the show" don't credit my husband really to anything. The boys do. But really they would not be where they are without the guidance,support and belief may husband has in them. And as an outsider waiting for my husband to walk in at 7pm to have dinner with us its annoying. When you attend a catholic private school in your interview you are clearly made aware School sport comes first club comes second. You always choose school first. So where is the loyalty? And the team spirit? or is it now everyone for themselves? My husband is trying to prove a point and set the standard for future years that you cant let your team mates and school down.

My son takes pride in his school. He wears the uniform with pride everyday he puts it on. He plays division 1 club but can only make the C's at school but he still gives it 110% because he loves his school. isn't that what its all about?

And i get that these parents want contracts with NRL clubs and want their sons to go on and be the "BEST" but come on find a balance. Don't threaten to switch schools..take them away from their friends disrupt their second last or last year of high school...i don't get it.

Theres always a solution. But you have to remember the people who got you there and helped you along the way.
and we all want whats best for our kids but you don't have to be a over bearing in your face parent.
Your kids are watching that behaviour and it will turn into a never changing cycle.

Enjoy them don't push them away with what you think is right for you. We have lived our childhood. Let them live theirs!

XXXX

Monday 27 February 2012

A penny saved is a penny earned....

We all work super hard these days for our money...i was driving this morning thinking to myself i "HAVE" to get petrol before it hits $1.51 today...my god $1.51!!! I remember when i was a kid dad would say to us "gotta duck up to the petrol station before petrol hits 50c!!" 50 CENTS holy crap.
A friend of son #1's mother texted me the other night wanting this name of a website that i buy the kids running shoes and footy boots off each year its UK based, and it got me thinking no matter how much you earn or have we always should be looking for that "bargain" that's what its about now. Never buying anything full price. This lady lives in a 3 million dollar house, with a pool, tennis court, footy goal posts for her son in the backyard, and a home theatre within the home...(my son loves going there by the way) but she texted me looking for cheap footy boots. i really like that when people that come from money or have money and don't flash it around or act differently are true people. Money hasn't changed them.
I think this day and age...especially with 4 children its all about saving, not being a tight arse but looking for that bargain that will save you so you can put the money to something else.
I have 4 children and they don't go with out. i actually think they are quiet lucky. Son #1 wanted $200 headphones...that to me is just unrealistic...thinking of all the things i could do with $200 i jumped on ebay and got a $16.99 pair really good from hong kong with free delivery...i cant get them off his head...WINNER!
I have recently also re-assed the whole birthday party thing....i think you have to weigh up their age and also will they remember it? Was recently looking into a party for my 2 year old in April...after pricing things it was going to come to $300-$400 to have it at home. And hes 2.
Son #2 turned 5 last week and we went to sizzlers...he was stoked. he couldn't stop talking about it all day and when we got home they were trying to work out who's birthday it was next so we could go again...isn't that what its all about...looking forward to something rather than getting it all the time? i love seeing my boys excited.
My husband and i have decide to compile a list of places to take the kids to eat for special occasion's, because we cant seem to go anywhere theses days for under $100.
MY DINING OUT/TAKEAWAY TIPS....
Sizzler is always a winner...not the best food but great for kiddies. we usually go here for special occasions and we have also received 2 gifts cards for Christmas which is an awesome present.
sushi train...my kids love sushi and the train adds the extra little bit to the trip.
pepes' Mexican...be smart with what you order go smaller than bigger as usually their portions are huge.
fish and chips is always a winner and good to grab if you have been working and want something quick and easy at home.
pizza capers is good if you have a voucher.
$3.95 cheeseburger lunch deals at maccas is great for the kids for lunch if your out...

sporting boots/shoes etc: Pro Direct sport UK...got footy boots for $49.98 delivered..Nike's.
i also use:
brandexclusive/ozsale.com/scoopon/living social

We usually book our Dec/Jan holiday towards the beginning of the year for the following year pay the deposit and pay it off that way it gives you 10 months to chip away at it. And we get a family holiday that the kids will remember when they have all grown up...i think its all about memories.

It just made me realise when talking to #1 son's friends mum that no matter what situation or position you and your family are in everyone is always looking to save a bit of money here and there. And if you can save on something you can put it towards your end of year holiday or Christmas presents...or house renovations!!! things are only going to go UP and UP...i really feel sorry for my kids when they are older could only imagine what petrol would be like then....XX

Wednesday 15 February 2012

its been so long...

well...its been a little while since i have written anything...i know a little slack.

Can i just say I hate doing school lunches ...i feel better now having said that!

Lots happening and getting back into the groove of term 1.
child one loving grade 7. lots of homeowrk and lots of responsibility which he just loves. sport is full on ...yet again and even though its only 3 weeks into cricket rugby starts friday night....NOOOOO!!!
Then i get told yesterday at a prep arvo tea that child #2 can actually sign up this year and play under 6ers!!!! Double holy CRAP!!! 2 playing!!!

Child #3 has decided the pram is no longer for him......WOW!!! so climbs out of straps and runs for the road. I so forgot that age and how quick you have to be. poor child #4 often gets left with abother prep mum while im piss bolting like a mad women to get 22 month old crazy boy!!! who has no sense of direction!!!

Child #4 has decided at 2am each morning that gooing an ga gaing is acceptable!!!! hell no buddy so im running on about 4 hours sleep a night....yipee ME!!! but it really is worth it when he gives me a really big SMILE!!!

Grade 7 are picking their 2012 leaders being a really competative school as all the boys are very good.. #1 as decided to put his name forward along with i reckon 100 other boys to try and become a leader. Sports leader is his preferance however i did encourage to put down a "back up" as there are so many boys going for that particular one so environmental is our 2nd choice...fingers crossed.
he would make a great leader if i do say so myself....im biased tho. he has to have an interview with 2 teachers on why he should be the leader then i think teachers and students vote! glad its him and not me. I remember being nominated for school captain back in high school and doing the speech so im feeling his nerves.

Child #2 loving prep tired but loving the 5 days a week.

me...well same old really kids, housework, hairdressing,bed and then do it all again the next day.
slowly but surely getting the 2012 routine down...both little boys sleep at the same time now at 11am so its go go go as soon as they hit their beds...washing, dinner prep, hair, floors you know the drill.

we have a birthday tuesday Child #2 hits the big 5!!! where did that time go. so baking cupcakes on Monday lucky me...god i hate cooking, but its for a good cause....LOL!

off to order rugby boots now...the days are never dull.....

XXX

Friday 10 February 2012

Boring...

I promise I will blog something super tomorrow night master no 4 has drained my energy by not letting me sleep this week.....:(

Thursday 2 February 2012

My darling preppie!!!!

Well child no 2 has hit the school yard this week and 5 days a week is starting to take it's toll... Cranky, defiant not wanting to go to bed little boy I now have.... Grrrrr!!!! So we have started the 13 year school journey with son #2. only 2 more to go. He's really having a good time though as he was getting bored at home... He's trying to be the funny man at school which is sooo cute. However he's doing well the thing with son #2 is he says what he thinks so he's mega honest at the moment! Which I think we might need to pull him in a bit on that one...you never know what's he's going to say next that child. Ahhhh he's precious.
Good work darl on starting your journey through school I'm very proud.
Xxxxx

Monday 30 January 2012

What a day...I need a drink!

Well....
Ventured to woolies today which trust me is a massive ordeal...
Because child #3 is still only little he cant walk on his own as he runs off...
So I pop him in the car first strapped in cause if you don't you will be chasing him all over the car like I did the other day for 20 mins in a carpark...
Then I get child #4... then I start the car for the air con and go back for the bags I need... There's usually 2 or more. When I got to woolies no baby seat trolley around in sight so I pouch baby #4 on the front of me and carry on my hip child #3. hand bag on other shoulder...
Get up to the top of the escalator and there one is... So I pop child 3 in and unpouch child 4 from front of me and head for the largest latte I can find asap!!!!!! I'm knackered and I havnt even entered woolies yet.... Coffee in hand list in other ( cause I always forget what I have to get) I head straight for a small flavored milk and the treat isle to keep child 3 amused!!!
Done!
I run into a lady with 2 boys also she has the double pram which u can use but only if your getting under 5 items.
We smile and start to chat we find out we both hav children that just started prep.. At the same school and we both have 4 children...we compare stories about how many times people say " god you have your hands full!"
We both say 3 was manageable 4 is frigging hard work!!!!
Back to the shopping.
Homeward bound... Then I do the unload of child 4 first as child 3 would run away... Then child 3 then the groceries into the front room. Whew.
2 bottles 2 bubs to bed. Shopping tired them out. Method in my madness!!! Both asleep by 11...dinner in oven... Groceries away... Washing hung out.... Awake by 1... Playtime... Lunch...load pram walk to get child 2.
Home... Afternoon tea onslaught ... Child 1 arrives... In a panic about homework... 4pm (load car.. Remember child 3 first then child 4)
Child 1 and 2 in car too... Off to swimming....leave child 1 there to walk home ... Bring other 3 home for bath time... 6pm dinner. (lucky it's pre done!)
Clean up... Lunches made... 7pm child 3 and 4 go to bed. Homework time now with child 1.
8pm bedtime child 1 & 2. (thank god!)
Now chat to husband time!!! ( non interrupted)
Watch a recorded show because we have missed all the good shows...
10pm bed.
Ready to do it all again tomorrow.
But I have to fit working in there when kids are sleeping tomorrow...
I need a drink!!!!!

Wednesday 25 January 2012

Happy Aussie day!!!!

Ahhhh a day off!!!
So our tv today has cricket in one room tennis in the other... Welcome to the house of boys.
Got my hair cut short yesterday made me feel like a million bucks till no one at home noticed again the joys of living with males...next lesson to teach them compliments will take them a long way... With their girlfriends or wives....they will win so many brownie points if they learnt this very simple lesson....so that's my next mission!

Saturday 21 January 2012

Ready steady GO!

Well the school year is finally here... Grade 7 and a preppie!!!
Everything sorted and done...$250 grocery shop yesterday, bags packed uniforms brought. With the new school year however brings routine and structure and a whole lot of running around and being super organized....
I'm very nervous but excited... I'm ready to tackle son #1's homework and helping son #2 get into the swing of things.... I have a feeling it's going to be a very big year. We are also now trying to weigh up selling at the end of the year or doing an extension this decision is proving to be a very hard one...but at least I will know where I will be for the next 17 years at least with 4 boys all going to be a Marist boy. So at least that's a decision made for me the area in which we will live... Thank the lord.
Well the let the year begin.....show me what ya got for me!!!!!!

Wednesday 18 January 2012

Friends...

When your having a down day or you have a lot going on you always know who are your friends.... Friends are magical and can pick u up when you need it the most!!!
I hope my boys learn to be good friends to their mates and with each other as they grow...


Tuesday 17 January 2012

your house my house...

Was doing my friends hair on Sunday and it was like walking into my house but in 5 years time...
15,10,9 are her kids ages...she works full time as a lawyer.
She had every ones school books lined up ready to cover, bags, shoes and a $380 bag of uniforms for Churchie....very familiar. She informed me never ever go shopping with them at these ages...she needed a bottle of wine after the expedition....and threatened "next time you can go with your father!"

I laughed and could just imagined in 5 years time me in the same position i will have ,grade 12, grade 5, grade 2, and a preppy.....I'm really scared!!!!!! that's going to be an expensive, emotional and chaotic year!!!!! 2017!!!!

My friend is one talented lady. She stayed at home right through till all her children started school. Giving up a high powered very well paid job to be home with and for her 3 kids.
While being at home she went back to uni and studied Law. Her plan, by the time her youngest boy started School she would be finished and be a Lawyer and go back into the work force full time...
She achieved this, studying while breast feeding attending lectures at night while hubby had the kids, and studying till all hours of the morning then backing up to children early in the mornings...now that's dedication and drive.
She now works full time and is very good at what she does, she runs her family home and does sports runs, dancing lessons...her husband is a very supportive man he is chief ironing man in their household.
I love going into their home. There's a lot of love, and fun. And you can really tell she lives for her children. They are the reason she gets up of a morning and goes to work to provide for them.
I really take my hat off to her because she is a role model, of how to have it all. I have known her for over 7 years, and i have enjoyed watching her children grow.
I hope i can show my boys the balance a mother/woman can do with the many hats we wear within our life....your house is very much the same as my house Mrs KP!!!
XX

Saturday 14 January 2012

To teach how to give.....maybe a new tradition for the boys?

Been racking my brain what I can do this year to teach my boys about giving to a cause or charity or just giving to those who need...
After giving it a lot of thought I hav come up with... With #4 son being sick is hospital I thought I might hav a box at home and throughout the year when see something on special at k Mart, target or big w it can go in the box we will aim for 20 things books, toys or clothes. At the end of the year close to Xmas we will take them up the the ward Tate was in and ICU and give them to the kids in hospital for Christmas. It made my day when my son got a small gift in hospital. So I will pitch the idea to the boys tomorrow and find a box... I think this is a great lesson to teach and hopefully it might be a new family tradition.
Xx

Thursday 12 January 2012

life is about choices...

Very busy last couple of days...son #4 very hard to settle after still not being 100% and in full school swing...uniforms for son #2 starting prep (cant wait for him to start as i think he really needs it) plus school books for son #1...and trying to write up a new schedule for sport/work/homework and meal plans for the week....but that's not what i want to talk about tonight.

Tonight i want to talk about son #1.
before i start i have to give a bit of a brief background, very brief...
I got married to son #1's dad when i was 21. And had him at 22.
I wanted to be a parent and he didn't he struggled with the responsibility where i loved it.
Its funny sometimes when you think you are doing things in the right order it really isn't.
engaged, marriage, children....isn't that right??? It ended. And is was very much for the better. ii have no regrets though as i was able to meet and raise my beautiful #1 son.

We then went on to have a very tough time with #1 sons father. it has gone on for years where he is in and out of his life and even at one stage when he was 4 years old didn't pick him up from daycare for his weekend visit...he had moved overseas without telling us. He then popped back up with a wife and child 4 years later when my son was 8 and wanted to take off from where he had left off.
My husband and i have been there for him every step of the way with counselling, encouragement and having open communication all the time....

My son decided last year after approx 20 something court visits and over $50,000 in legal fees that he was better off not knowing his dad the disappointment of having him return into his life then at any moment decide to leave i think was too much for him as he is 11 now. he made a trip on a plane to see him in December 2010 and from that visit he has decided not to contact his dad again after telling us himself.

I think you get to a point where you take a step back and say i have done as much as i can, with trying to encourage a relationship that just isn't going to work because of too much time passing.

I'm so very proud of my son. he is very resilient. He is a intelligent, popular and sporty young man. and i often picture myself at his year 12 graduation thinking my husband and i have raised and amazing boy. With everything he has gone through emotionally he has turned out exceptional...he could have been "damaged" or play the poor me card...but he doesn't. He often  says to me i love my life i don't want it to change.

We have had the privilege to watch him grow and mature. And i often find myself saying why has he been treated like this by his father? He now has 3 girls of his own. that he obviously spends time with and loves very much...why couldn't he do that with his son? what couldn't he give him the time and love? and make the effort that any parent should with their children? i used to get really upset because if you ever get to meet my son he is great with little kids, very polite, well mannered, and has the most down the earth personality...but he wont get the opportunity to ever know that because he has made the choice after many attempts from us to give up on his son. I don't get sad about it anymore. Because life is about choices, i may have made the wrong choice marrying him but i was given a beautiful son.
your life is determined by the choices you make. My choice is to enjoy watching my son grow into a man. To hold his hand as he grows, and to be with him every step of the way so he knows he can trust me and depend on me and i will be there for his failures and his success. that's my choice because i chose to be a mother.

Sunday 8 January 2012

Kids!!!!

Another trip to the hospital to check #4 sons breathing out..... Ahhhhhhhh!!!!! He's doing my head in this child! But all ok. Just have to keep an eye on him. Up to 6.5kg though and 10 weeks old little horror.... Kids surely keep u on your toes....off to bed before one wakes up.....there all tucked up asleep.., just how I like it,safe and sound.

Saturday 7 January 2012

Decision time this year...

I can feel 2012 will be a great year we are talking about selling our first home... We had two options when we brought it renovate or sit on it for a bit then sell it down the track...since having son #4 we are thinking selling might be the better option..just a lot to think about. and a big decision because I can see our next house being our long term house. I want to go back to school where you didn't have a care in the world. Things were so much easier and simpler then. It's hard when u now have 4 little people to worry about not just us...well I guess time will tell what we end up deciding I'm predicting 2012 is going to be the year of long talks and lots of decision making for our future with our boys....

Friday 6 January 2012

What a day....

Had a very unsettled day with son #4 today. And after his 12 day stint in hospital we hav watched him like a hawk.... But very draining. So tonight that's about it. I guess I will be sleeping with a child next to me tonight... So worried about his breathing. But hay ya gotta do what ya gotta do as a mumma 24/7.
On a better note whole family had dinner at sizzler. Son #3 was so funny. Ate so many lollies and jelly. He nearly passed out was hilarious to watch him then he started dancing to the music... He's a classic that child. And everyone behaved... Whoo hoo!!!

Thursday 5 January 2012

The end is coming fast...

I got the nicest gift today from one of my sons friends mum. And it took me by surprise. it was so lovely..the card read:
To an absolute ripper mum,
You win "Mother of the year" as far as I'm concerned.
I'm proud to be your friend.
 it made me feel very special.
Going to be hard when my husband returns to School (work) its been so wonderful having him help around the house and with the kids has taken a lot of pressure off me. Even though i haven't stopped its like a mini break...I really feel for some women that don't see their hubby's for months due to being in the army/navy/etc.
it must be very hard. I really think myself lucky.
Soon i will be back to packing lunches, strict routines and driving all over Brisbane. Not to mention that dreaded H word.....bloody homework. Cricket this year will be drop and go as i have the other 3 (2 of which will need sleeps) and then the good old rugby season.....WOWZERS!!! training 2 times a week for school 1 night a week for club then Saturday game for school and Sunday a game for club!!!!!rugby 5 times a week for son #1....swimming and tennis for sons #2 and #3...and a husband that will be aiming for another first xv premiership...hes got rugby 7 days a week. makes me shutter just thinking about it...its alright i have 13 days to gear myself up to going back to prepping dinner at lunchtime...wash when kids are asleep...and grocery shop on a Wednesday when i have 2 at school and one at kindy....this year i aim to be organised...and on top of everything as much as i can......sugar i forgot hairdressing and slowing doing up the house to hopefully sell ..........Its going to be a very busy year i think!!!

Wednesday 4 January 2012

Irish proverb

A man loves his sweetheart the most,
His wife the best, but
His mother the longest.

Tuesday 3 January 2012

dedicated to a baby in heaven....

Today i couldn't stop staring at my new bubba.
Every time he slept i watched him breathe.
Every time he fed i would look into his eyes and whisper "I love you bubba with all my heart."
The experience I had with my bubba is hospital made me realise just how lucky i am......
I have a friend, and before Christmas i called her an angel. And i think she really is. Her wings are invisible.
Her friend had a baby 15 weeks premature. And weighed 750grams. My bubba weighed 3770grams.
My friend came to visit me in hospital when i had bubba #4 as she was visiting her friends little boy. I was in a world of my own and didn't realise the extent of how tiny he was. When i saw my friend a few weeks after, the birth of my son she said she was visiting the little bubba as much as she could as her friend wasn't coping very well with him being so little...i looked at her and said "who does that?" who steps up for another mother and takes over when she couldn't...my friend. She visited that little boy and touched him and made sure he had someone there.\, even with a husband and 2 kids of her own at home. I asked her if she was angry that her friend didn't want to visit..."she will come around, she just needs time." I was angry and i didn't know anyone. Thats why my friend is an angel..she doesn't judge people, she would give you the shirt off her back and the last $1 in her wallet. She helped people in the floods when she lost also. Motherhood is a natural to her having 2 beautiful, smart children who will follow in her footsteps without a doubt. I'm so privileged to call her my friend. And i hope i can learn from her how to be caring,kind and humble....I had been thinking of him a lot last week being at the hospital, i bagged up some of my bubbas smaller clothes for my friend to take for him, And when i got a minute last week i rang my friend to see how he was doing...".he sadly passed away on boxing day." My heart sank. And i cried. And i wanted to cuddle my friend so much.
I knew she was meant to watch that little boy fight and help him but hes now in heaven watching over her saying "Thank you my angel for watching me, its my turn to watch over you."  XX

Monday 2 January 2012

I made it to day 2...

I am slowly getting the hang of all this and i really am enjoying the having something for me even if i don't get a lot of "Me'" time I'm going to try and make this work this year.....for me. Speaking of no "me" time my way of thinking is this...i have had 4 boys..who are very demanding..there will be plenty of "Me" time when they grow up right? then my husband and I can do what we want when they are all through school...the school fee money will then become our travelling money...well that's what I'm hoping for....
I have an amazing client who i do her hair every 5 weeks....she is my inspiration ATM.she has done this..
she has 2 wonderful girls both went to a private school ....and now they are in their 20's one is at home one just brought her first home...her and her husband now travel and go to dinner lots and she has the most amazing wardrobe!!! and SHOES!!!! she always looks fantastic ...and see i have hope for myself!!...she works 3 days a week solely to fund her manicures/pedicures/clothes/travel etc.......HELLO!!!!!!!!!!! I'm happy to do the hard yards right now...if that's the light at the end of the tunnel.
The reason for this blog...  is because this week i have given up my GOLD CLASS movie ticket to my 11 year old son who ate pizza with his feet up for a couple of hours...and now tonight #1 and #2 sons are with hubby at the drive in...while i watch sons #3 and #4..as they needed to go to bed. So a double whammy in the last 7 days...but you know what?  I'm ok..hard yards now...REWARDS later...if my boys are happy I'm happy...but sometimes i want to stamp my feet and act like a 3 year old cause i cant go......bloody motherhood makes us soft sometimes and selfless....hard yards now...good times later!!! will keep chanting that everyday!

Sunday 1 January 2012

Well took me so long to set my profile upi didn't actually get time to write anything for 1st of frigging Jan!!! Now I hav a 9 week old bubba on me trying to type...spent most of Jan 1st making lists...as soon as a new year hits I start the list making...organizing kids for school list,around the house cleaning list, grocery list, cleaning out boys rooms before the new school year I hav a list on what I want done...funny. Lucky I did the booklist back in December!!!! Hoping 2012 starts better than my 2011 ended...12 days in hospital with a 9 week old not fun at all... Actually the worse so far from the 4 boys. #1 boy had kholers disease back in 2006... A week in hospital while I was pregnant with #2.. that's fun sleeping in a chair 6 months pregnant. #2 had a trip to hospital around 2 years old with a dislocated elbow... Don't even ask about that one. #3 touch wood nothing. #4 well 12 days at 9 weeks old he holds the current record. So many more grey hairs lucky I'm a hairdresser... As they say there's a special place in heaven for mothers of boys... I have a penthouse with champers waiting for me...x